• Book Info
  • Scribbles

Wynded Words

~ Home of author Sarah Wynde

Category Archives: Personal

Tuesdays

14 Tuesday Jan 2020

Posted by wyndes in Personal, Pets

≈ 2 Comments

Tags

appreciate2020, Gizmo

Somewhere in the WordPress interface, there exists (existed?) a little calendar that shows you the days of the week on which you’ve posted. I can’t find it anymore, but I think I’ve been posting mainly on Mondays and Thursday for about five years. In 2020, I’m switching to Tuesdays. So radical!

Also a little ridiculous. There is no real distinction in my life between Sundays and Mondays — it’s not like I’m racing to get out of the house for my long commute to an office where I’ll punch a time clock. But Mondays still feel like Mondays and I want to focus my Monday writing energy on fiction. I’m imagining myself being so productive, so inspired.

And maybe I will be. I’m sure I could find a podcast that would enthusiastically tell me that anything I imagine hard enough will come true. Affirmations! Visualizations! Create the world you want! Yeah, I’m listening to (and reading) far too much self-help right now. I really do want to get into a steady meditation practice, because I know from past experience that meditation brings a stability and joy into my life that I very much appreciate. But I really am bad at it. So far I haven’t found THE meditation podcast that’s going to change my life, but the nice thing about meditation is that just showing up is half the battle.

This is maybe true for appreciation, too. For my 2020 reboot, I changed five of my six tasks in the Streaks app. The new ones are Meditate, Appreciate, Exercise, Learn, and Create. My sixth task stayed the same: Floss. It’s not quite so aspirational, but I really do a better job of flossing when my phone reminds me that I haven’t checked it off. Anyway, it’s easy to know whether I’ve successfully flossed — I suppose I could judge my level of flossing, but mostly it’s a yes/no question — but it’s not so easy to decide whether I have successfully appreciated. Is a two-second gratitude prayer sufficient? Do I need to prove to myself that I have felt appreciative? I’ve been tagging the occasional picture on Instagram with #appreciate2020 as a reminder, but mostly it’s just a mental moment.

Today’s appreciation, however, is the Giz, aka Gizmo, aka my current house guest. Van guest? I’m dog-sitting for my dad for a few days, so we have company in the van. Long-time readers might remember Giz, but he’s a golden peke-a-poo, a mix of poodle and Pekingese, sweet and charming, with a very fluffy tail. Hmm, I wonder if my experience with Giz is what makes me find fluffy tails so charming? Perhaps, because he wags his tail all the time and it is quite, quite adorable.

Giz does not quite understand the van life, however. He is mystified by why we are not in a house. He’s relaxing a little, but I swear he spent all yesterday waiting for us to go somewhere. “We are in the vehicle, why are we not moving?” he seemed to be saying. When I take him into the house, mostly intending it as a pass through to the fenced backyard, he promptly finds himself a corner near the couch and flops down to relax. And he has absolutely no interest in the backyard. He hovers by the concrete patio and avoids the grass. But he is sweet and snuggly and I’m enjoying his company.

Picture of the face of a golden peke-a-poo
The Giz

My brother was here last week for his annual visit and Florida did its best to shine for him. Perfect weather — in the 70s, sunny but not overwhelming. This week the temps are all in the 80s and it’s more overcast. This morning, I walked the dogs, wearing shorts, in a quickly burning off fog. The trees are all draped with Spanish moss here, and the light was beautiful, the dogs were energetic, and the air felt like summer. It was a lovely morning, easy to appreciate on many levels.

Rebooting 2020

06 Monday Jan 2020

Posted by wyndes in Meditation, Personal

≈ 5 Comments

I started out my new year with optimism, enthusiasm, and lots of plans… and then promptly got sick. Not my usual food reaction illness, either, but a real cold, by which I mean that four days in, I’m still coughing, still congested, still out of energy, and still wish I could just stay in bed. Blargh.

Van life is not particularly convenient when you’re sick. Like it or not, I’m going to drag myself out of bed today to find a dump station, because my black tank is overflowing. Not, fortunately, literally — there is no sewage on my floors. Basically, it’s just like having a clogged toilet in a house only instead of tackling it with a plunger, I pack up the van and go for a drive. It’s just an inconvenience, really, but not much fun when you’re sick. Well, never much fun, actually, but even less fun when sick.

My kitchen sink is also overflowing, but with dirty dishes. I haven’t been too sick to use my dishes — still eating, thanks to my awesome Dad delivering soup and OJ for me on Saturday (thank you, Dad!) — but I’ve lacked the energy to deal with the dirty ones. That’s never good, but especially not when you live in a van, because there’s no unlimited supply of hot water to soak or scrub the caked-on food off. So, yeah, today’s goal is also going to include washing dishes. Such an exciting start to the new year.

Whining over, I do have plans for 2020. Nothing as specific as a resolution, but I was listening to a meditation podcast which suggested picking three focus words. I would share a link to the podcast, but I don’t know which one it was — I’ve been listening to lots of them, because meditating more would be one of my resolutions, if I was having resolutions. šŸ™‚

Also, though, the podcast then suggested the three words be virtues and… well, no. Just no. It’s not that I think there’s anything wrong with virtues, but talk about pressure. Plus, virtues? Chastity, temperance, charity, diligence, patience, kindness, and humility? I’m not going to lay claim to any great moral stature here, but I honestly don’t think I need to focus on any of these things, except maybe diligence. Well, all right, definitely diligence. Still, not going to do it.

Instead, my three words are going to be verbs: appreciate, learn, and create. My goal for 2020 is to do those things every day. The first comes easy, the second takes more work, but the third is the hardest: fortunately, I’m giving myself permission to count blog posts & interesting food as creating! And my fourth goal is to forgive myself when I miss a few days, but then to start again. So, starting again — and looking forward to a fun and fascinating 2020!

1% Chance

19 Thursday Dec 2019

Posted by wyndes in Personal, Zelda

≈ 12 Comments

If I had a one-percent chance of winning the lottery, I would definitely play. Those aren’t great odds, but they’re better than any lottery odds I’ve ever seen.

If I had a one-percent chance of hitting the New York Times bestseller list, I would be thrilled. Not that one can ever get odds on being on a bestseller list, but given that millions of books are published every year and a few hundred make it to the NYTimes bestseller list, they’re definitely better than my real odds.

So if I might be sick with something that has a one-percent chance of mortality, how do I feel about those odds?

I spent part of yesterday debating that question, then opened up my computer and sent a message to my doctor. She’s going to see me this morning and we’re going to run the bloodwork and I didn’t ask how much it would cost. But I am so grateful for Obamacare today. It lets me say, yeah, 1% chance of dying is high enough to sacrifice some blood to make sure I’m fine. (I’m sure I’m fine.)

Zelda, however, sacrificed her blood last week to find out that she is not fine. She still tests positive for ehrlichiosis but she also tested positive for anaplasmosis. Wikipedia thinks those are the same thing in dogs, but the vet thinks differently. I really wanted to believe that’s what she was sick with this summer and that she’s recovered now, but the vet felt strongly that she should be treated, so we’re entering a cycle, probably a month, of hard-core antibiotics. I’m not happy about it, and she’s not going to be happy either. These are the same antibiotics she had in 2017, when she basically stopped eating anything except Whole Food roast beef delivered straight from my brother’s hand.

Fortunately, the vet took my concerns very seriously, so Zelda’s starting out with an appetite-stimulant and some anti-nausea drugs, too. The appetite stimulant is kind of awesome. The vet gave me two options, with the warning that one of them could make dogs “kind of hyper.” I took that one, thinking I handled puppy-Zelda, ergo I could manage “kind of hyper.” I can, but “kind of hyper” is a lot more challenging inside a camper van in the rain than it was in an apartment with plenty of room to throw a ball. It was fun, though. And she ate her entire bowl of kibble, twice, which hasn’t happened in years.

Worrying about Zelda has definitely been very distracting for the past couple of days, though. I keep trying to focus on Cici — who is probably worrying about Thunder and Lightning — but I can’t seem to get her moving. And I’ve got so much going on in the next several days. I may wind up just giving myself a break for the holidays and starting back up again post-Christmas. In fact, now that I’ve written that, I think it’s an excellent plan. šŸ™‚

So Merry Christmas! I hope your holidays are filled with joy and fun and the families of your choice.

Naming the Day

18 Monday Nov 2019

Posted by wyndes in A Precarious Magic, Personal

≈ 9 Comments

Today is either “Write a Book Description Day” or it’s “Stay Under the Covers and Feel Miserable Day.” One or the other, I haven’t decided which. Maybe it will wind up being both, but I sorta suspect that they are mutually exclusive. If I succeed in writing a book description, I won’t be miserable, and if I’m overly miserable, I probably won’t succeed in writing a book description. Chicken and egg, I think.

Anyway, my allergies have gone insane, which is making me pretty sad. I strongly suspect I need to completely eliminate dairy from my diet, which is not at all fun. I would like to somehow blame my state of being on gluten, but I can’t come up with any risk factors at all, so… well, it is what it is. Maybe I’m just sick.

Yesterday, Zelda hurt her paw. She is a stoic dog — a vet once said, “Even for her breed, this is a tough little dog,” as she patiently let herself be tortured — but she was in serious distress yesterday. Not whimpering, but holding her paw up as high as possible, not letting it touch the ground. She let me examine it pretty closely, pulling away a little but not resisting too much, and eventually I concluded that it was a fire ant bite right under her pad. I would so much rather it had been a burr. I gave her some benadryl, put some baking soda paste on it, and eventually, she mostly fell asleep but even in her sleep she was lifting her paw, trying to find a position where it wouldn’t hurt. It was not fun. I would rather be bitten by a fire ant myself than watch my dog suffer. Today should really be “Find the Fire Ant Mound and Kill Them All Dead Day” but the mere thought of that quest pushes “Stay Under the Covers” back up to the top of the list.

Last night, I was writing the book description as I fell asleep. I promised myself I would remember all the brilliant words I was writing. I don’t, of course. But I do know that I’m confronting the question of how much to explain about the Sia Mara in the description. Usually, I like very people-focused book descriptions. It’s Fen’s story, so what matters is who she is, what she’s faced with. But without the context of the Sia Mara, I’m not sure how to explain that. I’m also reminding myself that the purpose of the book description is to sell the book, not tell the story. But so far my two options for the opening lines are:

Missing, presumed… just fine?

Followed by something about Fen struggling to manage life in a magical underwater city until Gaelith disappears and Fen decides to run away to rescue her. (Basically, this is what happens in the first three chapters of the book.)

Or

For millennia, the Sia Mara hid from humanity in magic underwater refuges. They used to have seven of them. Now they have six.

Followed by, um… something that probably gives away the plot twists of A Lonely Magic. A dilemma. But the central concern of A Precarious Magic actually is both what happened to Wai Pa (the city that fell) and whether Val Kyr (another city) will fall. Mostly it’s just fun, though. I think, anyway.

Hmm, and I guess I’m working on my book description. Go, me! But if you have thoughts on those options, or opinions about what you like and dislike in a book description, particularly what motivates you to read on, please share!

white dog walking on green grass in heavily treed park
Somewhere in this scenic park, the evil predators might lie in wait. Or not. They might be in the yard, too, but it was after we came back from a walk that Z started favoring her paw.

Falling behind

11 Monday Nov 2019

Posted by wyndes in Personal, Randomness, Self-publishing, Writing

≈ 10 Comments

I’m feeling stressed this morning. It feels like there are so many things I should be doing, so much stuff to get done, and I’m not getting to any of it. I’d list it all out — a formal letter to get my rights reverted on the Spanish translation, investigate cheaper website hosting, first edit pass on APM, etc, etc, etc. — but the complete list would keep going and going, and it would make me more stressed. Instead, I’m going to breathe and remember the reasons why I’ve fallen behind.

I spent the first weekend of November camping with my niece at Lake Louisa. We used my camping chairs, ate good food, talked a ton, went to a writer’s event with my friend Lynda, built a campfire and toasted ghost-shaped marshmallows, and finished up by having Sunday brunch with my dad and stepmom. My clearest memory of the weekend, already a week later, is sitting in the camping chairs, watching the sky changing colors as the sun set and we talked about what it means to take charge of your own life.

My niece lighting our campfire at Lake Louisa.
I made C light the fire. It’s not hard to convince a 16-year-old that she wants to be the person to play with matches! (Not literal matches.)

Back in Sanford, at Christina’s house, I played games with C & co (her boyfriend & their sons). My favorite is definitely Song Pop Party, an Apple TV song recognition game that I’m terrible at but that I truly enjoy. We also played some Super Fight and some Azul. And we spent a full day playing Arkham Horror, including brunch in the morning with home-made hashbrowns and eggs, and pizza in the late afternoon. We knew it was going to take hours to play the game — it’s that kind of game — so it was a planned experience, but I think I am not someone who wants to play ten-hour games. It was moments of fun interspersed with much rules confusion and a fair amount of frustration. We did win in the end (it’s a cooperative game), but I would have accepted a loss quite contentedly if it came about four hours sooner.

On Thursday, I left Sanford to visit my friend Joyce in Casselberry. Our plan was to write, write, write. Instead we wrote a little, talked a lot, walked the dog, and enjoyed one another’s company.

On Friday, I drove down to Merritt Island to spend the weekend with my friend Lynda. Our plan was to write, write, write. Instead… well, we did write. I managed 1000 words on both weekend days. But again, there was much conversation. And 1000 words are okay numbers, but not NaNo numbers. Today is November 11th and my word count should be closing in on 20,000 words — instead I’m still under 8K. I’m approaching the zone where it’s going to be impossible to catch up. Not there quite yet, but getting close. Oh, well, I’ve been living a good life and that is more important than a word count! And Sunday was a beautiful day, with the kind of perfect Florida weather that has been scarce since I got here. We sat on Lynda’s porch and admired the water and talked for hours. A good day, even without the writing.

View of water off a dock and the moon rising, with a bird overhead.
The moon rising, from the back deck.

I’m also taking a class right now, called Write Better Faster. It’s the course from the book I mentioned a few months ago, called Dear Writer, You Need to Quit. I got so much out of the book that when the class kept appearing in my awareness — Facebook friends taking it, conversations showing up about it in weird places — I decided it was worth a try, and would complement my NaNo efforts nicely. As it happens, I’m no longer thinking it complements NaNo — it’s pretty distracting. But the first week of the class was all personality tests and thinking about writing pain points and how they mesh with and are caused by our personalities. Sadly for me, so far I think I’ve learned I should be an editor not a writer, which is not really the learning I was hoping for. But there are three weeks of the class left to go, so I’m still optimistic. And it is interesting, even if it’s not yet helping me write better and faster.

In other mixed news — is it good or bad, I wonder? — my Kindle Fire is dead. I have no idea what happened to it, but I suspect it might be the charging cable or the connection, since it basically just stopped working and will not start again. I’m sorta bummed about this, because I was playing two games that want regular check-ins. I’m missing my chance to collect dragons and lumber! But it’s undoubtedly going to be good for my productivity to not be able to check in on those games when I am looking for distractions.

Gorgeous morning clouds
View from the van window, 6:30 AM, November 11, 2019.

And now I need to get on with my Monday. I’m headed back to Sanford today, but I think my major goal for the day is going to be to write a complete to-do list — all those things that I chose not to include in the first paragraph of this blog post! — and start working on checking a few of them off. Dentist appointment, doctor appointment, oil change for the van. Book files updated and uploaded. Newsletter written and sent, etc. etc. etc. At least Monday blog post is checked off! And honestly, I have no regrets. The first ten days of November might not have been nearly as productive as I wanted them to be, but they have been lovely, enjoyable days.

A Perfect Disney Day

24 Thursday Oct 2019

Posted by wyndes in Florida, Food, Personal, Randomness

≈ 3 Comments

Drinking coffee through cough drops — not a good idea. Just saying.

Yesterday was a perfect Disney day. Truly perfect. The weather was nice, the crowds were light, and the lines were all tolerable. C & I got to Animal Kingdom by 8 and were on the Pandora ride before 9. It was my first time on the ride, the one where it feels like you’re riding a dragon, and it was truly spectacular.

The line was so short that we made it to the safari ride by 9:30 or so, which is the exactly right time to be on that ride. We saw ALL the animals, most of them active. The cheetahs were up and wandering, the warthogs were out, the giraffes were in the middle of the road waiting to be bribed away with treats. And the elephants were fighting, which was both amazing to see and a little bit scary. It only lasted a minute and then the smaller elephant turned his back on his slightly bigger brother and walked away. Big brother followed him, totally trying to make up. You could practically see him saying, “Don’t be mad, don’t be mad.”

two elephants at Disney's Animal Kingdom
I didn’t have my phone or camera with me, so I stole this photo from C. But this is just after the elephants were locking tusks.

After the safari ride, we headed to Epcot for the Food & Wine Festival, but before we ate, we went on Soaring, another of Disney’s best rides. I like the rides where you’re floating above beautiful scenery more than the roller coasters, I guess.

The Food & Wine Festival was always my favorite event at Disney. Over the years, it’s gotten bigger and bigger. The first time I went with R, we tried food from every country and left stuffed. That wouldn’t even be possible now. It would cost a fortune and there are just too many countries and types of food represented. But they’ve extended the time of the festival from a few weeks to months, from August to November, so it would be easy to go back again and again.

I probably won’t, however. This year they didn’t have a lot of gluten-free options. Some, definitely, and I could have eaten well only trying the GF options. Instead, I said the hell with it, and for the first time since 2016, consciously, knowingly ate foods with gluten. Smoked corned beef with a beer-fondue sauce; chimichurri skirt steak on corn bread; seared sea scallops with brussels sprouts and celery root puree; beef stroganoff with egg noodles; maple bourbon cheesecake; jerked chicken with roasted plantain salad; kenyan coffee barbecue beef tenderloin; and warm chocolate pudding with Irish cream liqueur custard. The corned beef, which I would never have chosen on my own, was definitely my favorite. It was delicious. (C & I were sharing plates, and the plates are tapas-style small plates — it was a lot of food, but not Roman-banquet-style quantities. :))

Was it worth it? I think so. It was fun, anyway. But I am now in the throes of an immune-system panic attack, which started much faster than I expected it to. I was coughing up a storm by 8PM, so it only took 8 hours instead of the usual 36. Fingers crossed that it doesn’t last longer or get more intense, but today is definitely feeling like the kind of day that’s going to involve binge-watching television with copious quantities of tissues nearby, instead of doing anything useful. So it goes. Yesterday was still a perfect Disney day.

Gratitudes

07 Monday Oct 2019

Posted by wyndes in Personal, Vanlife

≈ 8 Comments

On this relatively bleak Monday morning — gray and gloomy, and the kind of day where putting the spoons away includes bumping my head on the counter, and reaching for the coffee means spilling tea everywhere — I am reminding myself to breathe and be grateful.

Breathe and be grateful. Pretty much the two best pieces of advice ever.

So what am I grateful for? Well, I am grateful that there are no signs of a leak to go with the continuously running water pump. That’s a good thing. I am grateful that even though my battery seems to have mysteriously depleted its charge in the night well past recommended levels (8.5 for those who know what I’m talking about! 8.5!!!), it still seems to work (witness the continuously running water pump.) I am grateful that even though the tank level monitor appears to be completely screwed up, I never really used it much anyway.

I am grateful that the stomach flu that had me miserable throughout Saturday night and most of Sunday was short-lived and probably a food reaction. Yay to eating solid food again. I am also so, so grateful that my tanks were empty enough that they didn’t come anywhere close to overflowing and I didn’t have to dump them while sick.

I am grateful that my roof isn’t leaking in the rain, I am grateful that it’s warm enough that even though I’ve run out of propane, I’m not uncomfortable. Oh, and it occurs to me that maybe I haven’t run out of propane, maybe I’m just relying on a tank level monitor that’s screwed up at the moment, ha.

I am grateful that Zelda is snoring at my feet and ate breakfast this morning and that we went for a good walk in the dark before 6AM, because I was feeling better and she was lively.

I am grateful that even though I haven’t finished writing A Precarious Magic (and that seriously bums me out), I like what I’ve written and I think it’s fun, so I’m not intending to start revising from scratch just because I’m still struggling with the ending.

I am grateful that even though I didn’t make it to the Shenandoah National Park on schedule, I have a perfectly comfortable street to be parked in for the moment. And that even though the weather is not lovely for driving today, it’s not lousy either, just somewhere in between.

So much to be grateful for! And yet, somehow, it’s still a struggle… šŸ˜‰

Good intentions

13 Friday Sep 2019

Posted by wyndes in Books, Personal, Vanlife

≈ 4 Comments

On Monday, I meant to write a blog post. But I decided it needed a picture to go with it, so I got my camera out. Playing with my camera was so fully distracting that I never got around to the writing.

On Tuesday, I meant to write a blog post. But I’m using Freedom, an app to block my internet access, and I forgot to enable web exceptions, which meant I didn’t have access to my own website. Oops.

On Wednesday, I meant to write a blog post. But I started reading Debra Dunbar’s Imp series, quite casually — you know, just a quick hour of reading before I started my day — and I … just didn’t stop. Ten books in the series, and I kept going until I was finished.

On Thursday, I meant to write a blog post, but I was still busy reading books with demons and angels in them.

Today is Friday. I cleaned the van, washed and refilled my water jugs, dumped the tanks, refilled the propane, did my grocery shopping for the week, picked up the mail, and now I am finally writing a blog post. Mostly just so I can resist the temptation to keep binge-reading, though. My two days of reading have put me well behind on what I am supposed to be doing, aka writing a book. Speaking of which… I believe it’s time to get back to that. I’m still hoping to finish writing by the end of the month, but my daily word count goal is growing by the day. Despite all that I have already achieved today, I’d really like today to be a day that makes my word count lower instead of higher, which means it’s time to focus on Fen.

A burst of summer

28 Wednesday Aug 2019

Posted by wyndes in Personal

≈ 4 Comments

If I could fire myself, I would. I’m such a lousy employee. But what’s the saying? On your deathbed, you’re never going to regret that you didn’t work hard enough? Something like that? I am never going to regret this delightful last week of summer.

It included video games, mini-golf, playing with the puppy, walking an energetic and healthy Zelda, swimming, an outside picnic with burgers on the grill, a quick road trip with my niece to visit my aunt and uncle, looking at old family photos, a trampoline, tetherball, and ice cream. Actually, lots of ice cream, I think I had ice cream three separate times.

I didn’t take many photos and I can’t share the ones I did take, because they almost all include other people. But I don’t think any of the people in this photo would mind me sharing. Well, maybe my sister would — she’s the one wrapped in a towel. But she was so darn cute. We all were. It’s a picture that makes me happy just to see.

an old family photo of my grandmother drying off my sister after a bath, while my mom feeds me a bottle and my aunt sits on the floor. Everyone looks happy.
My grandma, me, my mom, my aunt, my sister. My grandpa called this photo, “Five babes in a bathroom.”

Next stop, Maine, for a quiet month of writing. I’m not looking forward to the drive at all, but very much looking to the sitting still time.

Maine & my first Travato meet-up

15 Thursday Aug 2019

Posted by wyndes in Adventures, Anxiety, Travel, Vanlife, Zelda

≈ 8 Comments

From New Hampshire, I headed into Maine, to my first big meet-up of fellow Travato owners from the Travato Owners & Wannabes Facebook group. (Serenity, the camper van I live in, is a Winnebago Travato, for any new readers out there.)Ā 

I arrived on Thursday, a day earlier than most of the others, because Gary, an online friend from the group, had offered to teach me how to change the oil in my generator. It was the first order of business when I arrived and involved raising the van on ramps, crawling under, draining the old oil, and pumping in the new oil. Gary did all the hard work, I mostly watched and chatted.

Conclusion – yay, I don’t need to change the generator oil for another 150 hours of generator time and yay, now I know I will probably not be doing that by myself. Ever. I paid $125 to have it done the first time it needed doing, which seemed expensive for an oil change, but now I’m thinking was a good deal. Of course, not nearly as good a deal as watching Gary do it, but I definitely owe him a bottle of wine. (Thank you, Gary!)

The rest of the attendees started arriving Friday morning and continued coming and going all weekend long. The spot was beautiful – a house on a hill owned by Trish, a stained glass artist, with incredible art inside, wide porches outside, surrounded by fields of wildflowers, and enough parking room for 20 or so vans to line the driveway. And the company was delightful — interesting people, doing interesting things, all of us ready to talk about our travels, the places we’ve enjoyed, adventures on the road, ways of living in our vans and mods. Many, many mods. (Aka modifications to the vans.)

scenic view with blue sky and wildflowers
The view from Trish’s hill.

Also, of course, our own lives. On the first day, I wound up sitting with two fellow dog owners, Deb & Ken, talking about journalism, editing, the dot.com years, raising kids with learning disabilities, writing books… and after a couple hours of conversation, Deb said, ā€œHey, we’re going to be on the road for the month of September, if you want our driveway, it’s all yours.ā€ I think I probably blinked a few times. Seriously? They live in Maine, across from a river, with bald eagles living in their trees… so, so tempting. 

That night, everyone brought out their camping chairs and we filled the porches while we ate potluck appetizers and desserts. The next day, some people wandered into town during the morning, while others hung around the house. In the mid-afternoon, Trish collected lobster orders and we all ate corn, grilled vegetables, and fresh Maine lobsters with butter. Afterwards, some people played cards, some played music, and some listened to the music. I was the latter, but there was lots of laughter from the card players — apparently, the Travato owners group’s card game of choice is called Five Crowns and I am definitely going to have to learn how to play someday. 

The next day, a few more people arrived and a few people left. Trish made a delicious lobster chowder for lunch for us all, and in the evening, people set out salads and snacks for another potluck. After dinner, we all carried our chairs out to the firepit in the front lawn and sat around a glorious campfire, toasting marshmallows for s’mores and listening to Faith and Daniel Senie sing and play. 

I feel like I spent a lot of my time following Zelda around as she roamed. She was a busy, busy wanderer, which was… well, interesting? My time with her feels so precious to me now and I want her to do what she wants to do. I don’t know how many days of wandering she has left, so I really don’t want to shut her in the van alone, which she is usually unhappy about, or tie her up. But I don’t know that anyone would ever have guessed she was an old dog from the way she behaved, except in that she stayed very clear of the more boisterous dogs. She didn’t want to play. But she did want to sniff every single solitary blade of grass and explore every corner. Fine by me. But one of the dementia problems is that she doesn’t respond to voice commands any more, although she still understands her hand signals, so I can’t trust her to come when she’s called. It meant a lot of interrupted conversations as I jumped up to follow her around.Ā 

On the last day I was there, I picked up some bruises. I actually took a picture of my bruised knees, which I am not going to post, because ugh, who wants to look at bruises? But whenever I stumble across it in the future, I am going to pat myself on the back.

So the story is: Trish had warned everyone that animals were welcome but that her dog, Rosey, chased cats and any cats would need to be kept in their vans.

On Monday morning, Rosey spotted a cat sitting in the doorway of her van.Ā 

As long-time readers know, last year Zelda was attacked by another dog. It was the fastest, most violent, bloody experience of my life — out of nowhere, aggression and blood and screaming and fear, and for Zelda, pain and shaky trembling and near-death— and I had some post-traumatic stress afterwards. I worked on it, because I didn’t want to be afraid of dogs, but I definitely became wary, aware of how quickly a dog could do deep damage, and tense around bigger dogs. I think my time in Arcata helped me get over the fear, because occasionally I had that reaction to Riley — when he moved fast or unexpectedly, my heart rate would soar, my breath would catch. He turned out to be the sweetest, softest, loviest dog imaginable, though, which helped me work my way through the anxiety.Ā 

And that was good, because when Rosey went for the cat, I went for Rosey. Even as I jumped on her, I knew that if she turned around and went for me — which is a not unnatural reaction for a dog in a fight who feels herself being attacked from behind — I was going to get hurt. But I didn’t let the fear stop me. And yay, Rosey didn’t go for me, and I didn’t get bitten, and the cat escaped and was unhurt and Rosey was unhurt, too. She didn’t even get scratched. A couple hours later, she came and snuggled up with me on the porch, letting me give her lots of rubs and scratches, so she didn’t hold a grudge either. I didn’t realize that I’d landed hard enough to bruise my knees until the next morning, when I rolled out of bed and said, ā€œOw, what the heck?ā€ But I’m pleased with those bruises, because they are a symbol of recovery from fear. I like that in a bruise.Ā 

Moving on, later on Monday I headed down to South Gardiner and Deb & Ken’s house. I had a lovely afternoon/evening with them, sitting in their front yard watching for eagles and chatting, and then sharing their dinner. And temptation accepted! I’m going to spend September in their driveway, working on the book (finishing it, I hope) and watching the eagles. And the loons and the hummingbirds and the river. I’m pretty delighted with the change in my plans.Ā I might even manage some kayaking.

Meanwhile, on Tuesday, I drove to Rockport to spend some time with my friend Barbara (first pausing at a rest stop on the New Hampshire highway to have lunch with Pam and S). More about that later, though, because this blog post has gotten long and our lunch plans — steamers? not something I think I’ve really had before — are beckoning.

← Older posts

Subscribe via Email

To receive new posts via email, enter your address here:

Instagram

Just catching the sunrise
A little patch of flowers in the wasteland.
Spring is on its way. Yay!
The second rainbow on the right is a little hard to see in the photo so look close.
Pre-Epcot breakfast, made by Frisbee. Total SuperHost. All the stars!

Meta

  • Log in
  • Entries feed
  • Comments feed
  • WordPress.org

Proudly powered by WordPress Theme: Chateau by Ignacio Ricci.

 

Loading Comments...