I’ve taken my own advice and rewritten one of my book descriptions.

The current description is:

For Dillon Latimer, meeting his long-lost mother comes too late. He’s been a ghost for five years. Still, a little thing like death won’t get in Dillon’s way when he decides his mom’s life needs improving.

Unfortunately, it’s not easy for ghosts to influence the material world, especially when every choice Sylvie makes brings her deeper and deeper into danger.

Sylvie Blair ran away for reasons that seemed right at the time but she’s never let go of the past. When it comes back to haunt her—literally—she’s forced to face her regrets, even as she tries to decide whether to believe her high school sweetheart’s crazy stories about ghosts and drug cartels.

Can Sylvie let go of the past and embrace the future?

And can Dillon keep his mom alive long enough for her to live happily ever after with his dad?

New description:

At seventeen, Sylvie Blair left her infant son with his grandparents while she went shopping. She never came back.

Twenty years later, she’s devastated to learn of his early, untimely death. But although Dillon’s body is long since buried, his spirit lingers on.

And he’s not real happy.

He doesn’t like his mom’s job—too dangerous. He doesn’t like her apartment—too boring. And he definitely doesn’t like her love life—non-existent.

But when Dillon decides that his parents should be living happily ever after, he sets them on a path that leads deeper and deeper into danger.

Can Sylvie let go of the past and embrace the future?

And can Dillon survive the deadly energy he unwittingly unleashes?


Any feedback? Typos? Confusing sentences (beyond the natural confusion)? Opinions or revision suggestions?

Thanks for any help!