I took B to the vet this morning and dropped him off and it’s thrown off my whole schedule. Nearly forgot about writing a blog post entirely!

He’s getting his liver enzymes tested again. They were too high a few months ago and he’s been on liver pills ever since. I wish I could say that I thought he was going to be all better, but I have a sneaking suspicion that what he really needs is to lose weight and to not get any treats. I, however, lack the willpower to make him stick to a diet. He’s such a beggar and his eyes are so eager. The moment when his ridiculous fluffy tail starts to droop instead of frantically waving just gets to me every time and I succumb.

That said, he’s in such great shape compared to how he was when he came to me. His fur is gorgeous and sleek, his eyes are bright, he doesn’t hide, he lets me clean his ears and put my hands by his food… I wish I was the perfect dog mom and he got nothing but kibble and the occasional greenie — oh, and got his teeth brushed every day! — but we stumble along in our mediocrity.

Managed to get some writing done yesterday, although only a few hundred words. This morning I’ve written 103. Not NaNo numbers. But I’ll persist. I keep reminding myself to just tell the damn story, but I’m finding my current scene really difficult. I can remember, years ago, having a therapist very patiently ask me, “But what were the feelings?” and to whatever I’d answer, she’d say, “That’s not a feeling. Try again.” That’s what’s happening in my current scene. Grace is having feelings and I don’t know how to name them. Fear led to anger led to… ? Self-recriminations, I guess, but maybe my problem is that I’ve gotten there too fast. Anyway, I’m going to get back to it — I hope all my fellow November writers are doing better than me. More words!